FIVE YEARS AGO…. …..from the grave of memories…

Memory Lane street sign
My memory is loyal to me, more loyal than my best friends.
Dai Wangshu (1905 – 1950)

5 years later and as I take that lonely walk through the quiet streets of Moremi hall to Mozambique hall, with the quiet treading of my feet and the silent thoughts of my heart, I could not but feel the warmth that my red heart felt within its cavity. It was purposed to be a late night unwinding and innocent walk.. I had no pre-formed opinion of opening up the grave of memories. Maybe I should have avoided sitting on the bricks of that shed…. Oh I really wanted to say lover’s nest just opposite the prestigious dwelling place of the Mozambique queens…
That was the key… the grave was opened and the memories flooded in. It was a tornado-like experience, not even the gentle cold wind nor could neither the serene environment nor the sight of the two love birds whispering to each other’s ears wave it off. I was in there and yeah I was completely stuck in there…
My first day in school (was not entirely my first day away from home) I mean, I had spent the last 6 years or thereabout in-between the bushes of the jewel of the jungle…. Mehn… that’s a story for another day. So, I knew what it was like to leave home to meet an entirely new set of people. Either which way, there were still a whole lot of questions popping up in my teenage mind. Would Uni be like in the movies? Who would my roommates be? Would they influence me? Would I be allowed to make my own decisions now? Could this be the freedom I so much desired? Would it be easy to make new friends out of this unknown set of people? And the list is endless….
It seemed like school had prepared answers for me if only I would obediently go through its wall and learn the lessons. My first day in Uni started out as my first stressful day… getting through the rigors of accommodation and all of that (ask an OAU person that existed in my generation not these new generation ones o). M2-that was my room number and as I skipped excited the stairs that led to my cubicle for the next one year… I wondered and silently prayed Dear God, please give me good roommates. Trust me, I tried to be as nice as possible but that same day , I happened to have my first fight in my new room and this chic ended up becoming my bunk mate for the running year…(Awww!!) so much for a first day. She was not exactly my friend until much later (one I would never forget). Talking about friends, I did eventually have my own share of good friends in OAU but my first friend….(Anny.. that’s not her real name, it’s her pen name not so far from Anifat her real name…. we’re still friends … missed her call yesterday, should beep back soon). You know, she was the first to read public my first write up…IF I WERE…. Someday, I should revisit that divinely inspired article and put it up here for you.
Oh! These lurking memories. How could I forget my first day in Ajose lecture theatre… omo mehn… that was slavery in disguise! Getting to class at 5:30 am and praying to get a seat on the stairs or at least a place to stand for an 8am class… God dey o….and of course! My first test… CHM 101… hmmm that course ehn. Amidst all of these, every Friday came with some sort of relief. It was the only day that we got to meet. Yes us! my first little but large family(YDI) I got to know them on my first Easter in school(not my first away from home though… spent a couple of Easters in the jewel of the jungle- #extension things). That day in between those walls of Eden and on that high chair not totally engrossed in the dear movie but silently thinking in my heart, I knew I was going to stay here. No one was ever going to try to convince me not to. It was worth it. 5years and still counting I have no regrets.
Each first experience did not seem like a big deal but I really must admit that it’s still big deal. The list is endless…. The enthusiasm was on the high, the zeal was intoxicating, the passion was classic, the drive was almost uncontrollable. What happened along the way I finally asked me on the return trip or did the words of the British poet Lord Byron eventually come to pass that, “Years steal fire from the mind as vigor from the limb, and life’s enchanted cup but sparkles near the brim. While I did not entirely lose it, I knew I bargained for much more than I have eventually gotten these last five years. I dared to dream….wild dreams…crazy to the ears… scary to my thoughts… Back then, they seemed big, but maybe I dreamt too little. . It may be that over the years, there was diluted passion or somewhere therein, I lost focus not totally but got caught on to other things which were not in the original plan. Whatever which way the race is still on and I’m not about giving up.
I summarize today’s lesson for the night in the words of Saint Francis de Sales (1567 – 1622)
“Big fires flare up in a wind, but little ones are blown out unless they are carried in under cover” When you intend to set a goal or you dare to dream, if you can step out to do it, then you had better do it and do it BIG. More often than not, you dream little dreams because of the dread of not having the means to achieve them or you’re scared of being too unrealistic in your own world…Trust me you have to be real daring in the world of dreams to set up a large fire of dreams. But only the daring dare to do it, so only the daring get to know that all they need to get to that point is ready. Dare to dream friends … dreams that are scary to your being, dreams that send shivers down your spine, dreams that set up pine-like foams on your bed and get you running till you achieve them.
And of course the most important lesson I got to know… don’t ever think you can accomplish those things on your own…”coz you got to be crazy to think that you can continue in your own effort what was started by God… Hand the reigns over to God and enjoy the ride darl….
And of course, send me an invite when you get there!
Much love, Zee.
7/29/2013 12:50:28 AM

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY

ImageHello mom,

This is a public declaration of the fact that you are irreplaceable. Much more than i can try to fathom, you’ve been there all days long. thanks for those sleepless nights you had, those hungry days for me, those heart-felt prayers I feel, the countless measures of love. How on earth would I forget to say thank you for the scoldings that are ever on the tip of your lips, for that beating I would never forget ( you remember too now), for the lessons you have diligently taught.

I am not yet a homogenous blend of the kind of daughter you want ,still you raise your head up high for me through the darkest moments. You’ve taught me love not only by the words of your mouth, but majorly by your actions.That confidence you instilled in me is growing by the day. People wonder where it came from. The suprise packages and the tear-stained pillows will tell the tales.

Thanks for loving my dad the way you do. You are a phenomenal woman and no one can deny that.

Dear mother, there is so much to say to you , i cant definitely exhaust the words. you are not the best mom in the world because you are incomparable. You are the perfect example for all other moms.You deserve to be celebrated everyday. I LOVE YOU and I promise that someday, you’re going to be real proud of your little best friend.

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A BARREN’s PLIGHT…

Hunted and dismayed she be.

Lean frame turned thin.

Thinned out skeletal form.

Whispers of the night echoes her tears.

Drums after drums she drains from her sockets.

In pity I watched from afar…the tears…

I watched them drain into the deep wells of her clavicle.

Will there ever be an end to the tears?

Will her travails ever be over?

Will this trauma ever elude her?

Will joy ever be hers in life?

When? When?? When???

When will a kick from her inside come?

When will her child on her laps dance?

When will a nation from her wombs emerge?

When will her generation of champions be born?

Adejuwon G ‘Wemimo

A MEMO TO MY FRIEND

It really ain’t no news to you
That I’m no good poet.
Thou art the quiet intellectual,
Endowed with a gift in your hands.
Thou art the ‘gentle god’,
whose cool but firm command
thy pen obeys without reluctance.

Me-is the girl beneath the woods,
Who listens to the whispers of the birds,
Dancing to the melody of their tunes
Scribbling with all vigor , the words of their mouth.

As though in a race,
my thoughts run with enthusiasm
struggling for attention
till behold none on paper I could get.

If I were a king,
ruling the world of my heart with passion
And subjects my every thoughts were to me,
Without reluctance I would enslave,
Till every letter was captured on the memoirs of time.

Oh!epitome of humility
Wisheth it me to write for you
from the long, short, bright and dark routes of my world
where thoughts of mine be as flying electrons.

As smart as i think i be,
squeezed me out these few words..
… THANK YOU FOR BEING MY FRIEND…

DO YOU???

imagesDear you,
Hi… how have you been? Sure great and bubbling. Actually, I have been good and well been trying to occupy myself with a whole lot of things. Earlier I told you I was learning French and well now I am trying to update my blog. Each day has been fulfilling and well has been good.
One of these days, I was in a gathering and one of the guys there said something really funny,. Well, to me it was quite funny, to you, it really may not be. Okay, here we go, he said that these days, people now get to meet their spouses on Face Book, Twitter and in general, on social networks. And that he earnestly anticipates the day that marriages will become online marriages (whatever, we already have online dating so what is the big deal?). When the priest will probably maybe on his face book wall …. “Do you Lagbaja Kasiru take Omolema Juin to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love and cherish, in health and sickness, till death do you part. If you do click like. And well he will repeat the same for the wife.
And well, if it was on his twitter page, he would post the same and then at the end, re-tweet if you accept and mention your wife. That was where he stopped imagining. I helped him to take it further a bit and then humbly questioned me that so what happens to the part of you may now kiss the bride? Maybe the bride would need to Google her kiss or send it by Bluetooth to their spouse.
Now, the point is that technology is growing at a mega-geometric rate and no one can try to predict what the next technological development is.. So, I keep asking myself this simple question should one really try to follow through every development or should you just ignore some. Or really isn’t the world going real crazy with this whole development thing?
Okay, just wanted to make sure that I talked to you this week. Ok, please do drop your opinion about this or rather you could help me continue the thinking process. You got an idea on how the groom may kiss the bride? Smiles…

For real,
Much luv,
Zee

MY SIBLINGS AND I….….. Why we fight the

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MY SIBLINGS AND I….

….. Why we fight the way we do…..

You may have come across Tim Lahaye’s best-selling book why you act the way you do. A good number of people actually have issues with why their friend behaves the way she does and why the chap would just be nice all of a sudden. Now, get this, I promised myself I would never try to analyze people because in the long run, my analysis will just be as good as useless. So, my conclusion on behavioral difference issue is- let people be, accept them the way they are, and if you can’t then relocate and reposition yourself.

However, just recently, I came across a very interesting topic on why siblings differ from each other. You probably just shook your head like yeah! Why do I always quarrel with my siblings? While Tim Lahaye’s book on temperament might provide a lot of answers to the temperamental behavior of each sibling, another question then arises that why should siblings then differ from each other in terms of temperaments, after all, we grew up in the same environment, we were raised by the same parents and the likes. In my own opinion, behavioral differences cannot be fully understood by anyone and kudos must be given to psychologists who take a lot of time studying humans.

One of these psychologists in his study gave the following reasons for the behavioral differences in siblings.

  • Non shared environmental experiences
  • Parents treat each child differently
  • Each child has different experiences outside the family
  • During late childhood, children often deliberately try not to be like their siblings- a process called SIBLING DEIDENTIFICATION.

Now, this was the part that got my attention because it suddenly dawned on me that it was true. From personal experience, I have had my siblings tell me to my own face that there are things I do that they would not do. Well that is kind of expected. I mean everyone was created to be different and if all of us at home had to behave the same way, mehhnn that house would be dry o. in the process of de-identifying themselves, the other sibling might take offence or in actual fact things might even become muddled up. This happens because, ironically, genetically similar people actively strive to be different from people they have the greatest potential to resemble and in a bid to change themselves or create the kind of self they can live with, there is a thin battle line of rivalry that is drawn.

Unfortunately, a good number of people are not skilled at managing this somewhat natural occurrence and as such may allow it develop into something not controllable. This is not to say that there are no persons that can adequately manage the rivalry. Managing it however requires a lot of understanding and patience. A lot of times, having opposite temperaments might also hasten up understanding each other.

But like I said earlier, I concluded a long time ago that no one can ever be like me in conduct and behavior. So if I am going to learn to be at peace with all men, siblings or not, I would also have to learn early to accept people for who they are, live up to my own standard for me while desperately hoping that my siblings would at least learn from my mistakes. And even if they have to de-identify themselves in the long run, they should de identify from the bad characters I actually have and create a better world around themselves.